New James Bond title: Calories Galore

Hi everyone,

Jule Egleston, my dear sister, took the family to dinner last night at Metropolitan Grill to make sure my birthday mode could continue. I took advantage of the excellent food to stuff another month’s worth of calories into my mouth.

It’s now official. I’m fat. Fat, fat, fat. When I put on my trousers, my profile looks like a snake swallowing a frog. Ack!

I’m going back to the gym. Have to. I don’t know when, but this body has GOT to improve!

To all who contributed to my new shape, I love you. As for my total lack of willpower, that is my problem. I’ve learned that my belt enrolled me in the Suspenders of the Month Club and is leading a campaign for Congress to name April BE KIND TO YOUR BELT month. Desperate times call for desperate measures.